Oh, Tannenbaum.

So my younger brother, a freshman in college, was very adamant that we wait until he return from school before we made the annual family pilgrimage to get a Christmas tree. Which I understand-- I know that it's a sort of natural feeling to feel misplaced or lost in your own family after leaving for an extended period of time, so that made a lot of sense to me. And we do, indeed, wait for him to return home. We then wait for about a week or so while everyone else lives their lives (school, work, in my case drinking and designing costumes-- not at the same time, mind you, but that's what I've been up to). In my brother's case, as far as I can tell, the last week has been primarily spent watching "Scrubs" on the couch in nothing but a pair of navy blue sweatpants, but I digress. So today the decision was made that come hell or high water, today would be the day for this tree.

And then we wait. We wait until I wake up and ditch my hangover (about one p.m. or so). We then wait for my brother to come back from a funeral (of a woman he didn't really know, but I'm not getting into the politics of that). And so as he pulls in the driveway, my mother, thirteen year-old brother, and I are eagerly waiting... until he announces that he's just too tired and he needs to take a nap this afternoon before going out tonight.

Well.

So after a few heated words, the general consensus is 'fuck it.' We pile in the car, drive to the place we go every year. This year, there are about four trees propped up outside against the main warehouse with the annual tree extravaganza. We walk in, remarking on how decent-looking just the trees propped up outside look this year, and are about to start turning the door handle when a man with about three teeth informs us that "That's it. Sold out. Those four are the last ones left."

On second thought, we look again at the four trees. We then realize why none have sold-- they are all priced at $175. Now, I'm not trying to be ridiculous, I realize the environment and economy are both in the shitter and that both things come at a cost-- but $175 for a tree? You've got to be kidding.

Fortunately, the nice -- if dentally challenged-- man at the garden place gave it to us for 50 bucks since we did wait until the very last minute and they weren't going to sell it anyways, but still. Got it on top of the car for us and everything looked swimming.

And then my mother promptly pulled the car into the garage with the tree still ON it. The whole back side is pretty mangled, but the garage door at least is still in its tracks this year. It's now soaking up a bucket of water in the garage, where I'm sure it will remain until at least Christmas Eve, when we remember that not only has the tree stand been broken since last January, but no one knows where we stored the ornaments.